Hadriel Inbox

[theweakhavepurpose]

INBOX This is... this is Deputy Pratt of the Hope County sheriff's department... art credit code credit

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[theweakhavepurpose]

Not everyone can stand up to them. That's the point.

[unphase]

I guess. [she sighs unhappily] I guess it's up to those of us who can stand up to them to help.

[theweakhavepurpose]

Yeah.

You're braver than most everyone I've met. Even in this place where half the residents have crazy powers.

[unphase]

[her mouth forms a little O of surprise before she recovers]

...really? You think so?

[theweakhavepurpose]

Absolutely.

Why? You don't think so?

Do I get to be your cheerleader for once?

[unphase]

I just--I do what I think is right. That's all.

[she blushes] ...maybe?

[theweakhavepurpose]

Heh. How the tables have turned.

Yeah but what you think is right, is actually good. There's a lot of people that have convinced themselves that what they think is the only way. You can convince yourself of just about anything - and if you believe it's right - you can commit atrocities without remorse.

But you're actually doing good. And that's pretty rare.

[unphase]

[she blushes even more]

Mother would be horrified. She was all about gaining power and prestige by any means necessary.

[theweakhavepurpose]

What for? Prestige doesn't get you anything. And what's the point of power if you're not gonna use it.

[unphase]

Ah, but prestige gets you respect. And it makes people fear what might happen if they cross you. And mother uses every bit of power she can gets her hands on.

[theweakhavepurpose]

To do what?

I sorta became a cop for the same thing. I wanted the respect, and people deferring to me. Kind of a power trip you know? But I didn't really .. do much with it. Not anything that matters.

[He maybe showed up to bars in his uniform because it would get him laid, but not much else.]

[unphase]

[she shrugs] Why does anyone want power? So they can impose their will on others.

What do you think would have mattered?

[theweakhavepurpose]

I could have helped more people. Been active in the community other than just enforcing laws. I dunno. There's a lot - but I didn't realize it at the time.

[unphase]

That's the problem with hindsight. Once something has passed, what should have been done instead is perfectly clear. But there's nothing we can do about it.

[theweakhavepurpose]

Yeah. I sorta worry about that here. That there's something more I should be doing, but I won't realize it until later.

[unphase]

I don't think anyone here could ask more of you. You're a good person and a good friend. That's got to count for something.

[theweakhavepurpose]

[Stop making him blush! ]

Thank you. I'm trying. I think. I feel like I'm trying.

[unphase]

[but it's so cute!]

You are. You're trying really hard. And I know that it can't be easy.

[theweakhavepurpose]

[Nuuuuu.]

It's really not. I feel like I'm a toddler back at pre-school learning how to share and what emotions are.

That shit with the cult really did a number on me. I guess I didn't really realize how hard it would be til I was out of there.

[unphase]

I'm not sure anyone ever really does realize how bad a situation is until they're out of it. Then, they can take a step back, think things through, and...try to find something close to balance again.

[theweakhavepurpose]

Hindsight is 20/20 right?

Yeah. I'll.. try and keep that in mind going forward.

[unphase]

Exactly. There are a lot of things I could've done differently, but didn't.

Good. You need to be a little kinder to yourself.

[theweakhavepurpose]

I know. But it's hard. I've never been kind to me. I don't even like me. Even before... all the cult shit.

[unphase]

You didn't? But--why?

[theweakhavepurpose]

I'm kinda a dick. And I'm short and scrawny and I'm no good at brawling so I lost a lot of fights in high school.

[He pauses, thinking about it.]

I wanted people to like me, so I sorta acted how I thought people wanted.